Snakes, rats and pigeons travel by Tube, too

I've recently come back from a week walking in Alpine meadows, hearing cows' bells tinkling and generally enjoying the beautiul mountain scenery and the clean, fresh air. It has been warm in London this week and travelling on a fetid, cramped and sweaty Tube is not pleasant. In fact, you couldn't get more of a contrast with the Alps.

This post isn't about lefthandedness, but anyway...this led me to thinking about the amusing things I've seen on the Underground here in London over the years:

• A pigeon jumped on at Earl's Court, faced the doors - stock still (like a commuter) - and, when we got to the next station, it hopped out. It wasn't looking for food in the carriage, it was simply using the train to go to High Street Ken.

• Two (quite talented) buskers I'd see regularly would use a spanner as their microphone (or 'wrench' for those of you reading this in the States)

• An African lady in wonderfully colourful robes carried a huge suitcase up the escalator on her head (absolutely no hands - seriously impressive)

• A transvestite dressed in a summer floral frock, high heels, wig and lipstick. Nothing that unusual, but he had a beard and really hairy legs. Looked like Kenny Everett when he was in drag.

• A young woman had a pet white rat running around her shoulders - no lead attached to it or anything. The whole carriage recoiled, convinced it would jump off her and onto someone's lap.

• The best, though, was one I didn't see myself. A Kissagram we'd ordered for one of the bosses at work (remember Kissagrams?) came to the office, complete with a six-foot snake which was part of her act. She always travelled on the Tube with it in a blue weekend holdall. On one occasion, the zip had opened a bit and the snake took the opportunity to poke its head out and take a good look around. The woman opposite saw it and started screaming loudly. Her husband thought she was having an attack of hysterics and started slapping her face to bring her out of it. The Kissagram lady realised her pet snake was the unwitting cause of this woman's screams and, as it was her stop, picked up her bag, zipped it up firmly and got off, hearing the hapless woman's shouting 'snake, snake!' to a disbelieving husband.